The Chou Life

I haven’t had to deal with a death very much in my life. As far as I know, my grandfather on my dad’s side has been my only family loss. Attending the funeral and seeing my grandfather in the casket would be the second and last time I remember ever being with him. I was saddened by his death but maybe even more so that I had no relationship with him and couldn’t tell you what any of his “favorites” were. I have had pets die, but even then it’s been picayune. I had a gold fish die because I fed it too much. I had our family cat, Cuddles, die but that was pretty much the biggest conspiracy of all time. From what I remember, Cuddles was in a fight and she sustained some large wounds that reminded me of bruised and over ripe watermelon. My family, in an effort to safeguard my little heart, divulged little information to me about the happenings of our cat. I don’t even remember feeling like she had died…only that she wasn’t there anymore. It wasn’t until I was much older that I found out the true demise of my feline companion. My parents had chosen to euthanize her in light of the severe injuries. This would be just one of the many times little Eric would be left in the dark by his conspirators ( ai ni mama, baba, jiejie).

I have lost several elderly patients from natural causes that we were unable to reverse. Many people think that when an ambulance is called, we come and “fix” people. It’s interesting because we hardly ever fix our patients. The instances I can think of are those that overdose on narcotics and are miraculously aroused by dosages of narcan or the hypoglycemic diabetic that is revived by our glucose. These are truly life threatening conditions that we have just pulled our patients out of. In most of our other calls, minor intervention is all that is necessary or in the cases of death by natural causes…there is very little we can do to truly remedy the situation. I think that is hard for people, me included, to swallow. My job is to help people in need and “fix” them but sometimes we just can’t.

Last night started out relatively chill. Right out the chute, we had a transfer from Presbyterian downtown to a rehabilitation facility. After that we had some back to back calls but we were canceled off of those. After some down time, we were called to the house of a 100 year old lady suffering from an apparent lateral myocardial infarction or heart attack. Due to her condition, we drove code 3 lights and sirens, to the hospital. We got her to the ER and staff there took over patient care. We left the hospital and pulled into a nearby parking gas station. I was asking my partner Freddy for some tips on code 3 returns since they are still a stressor for me. Unlike code 3 responses to calls where I can convince myself that “this is not my emergency,” for the code 3 returns, I feel now more involved and part of the patient/family’s struggle. Freddy had just finished with his pointers when we received a call in the southeast for a 9E1. A list of medical priority dispatch system (MPDS) codes can be found here.

The MPDS codes are made up of a number followed by a letter and other number. The first number denotes the type of incident. The letter gives the degree of seriousness to the incident. A being the least and E being the most life threatening. The last number gives more information about the incident.

So from the link, you see that this is categorized under cardiac, respiratory arrest, and death; specifically referring to a patient that is not breathing at all. We hear the alarm room dispatch the call to station 11 over the fire radio. “Patient is a 2 month male, not breathing at this time, unknown downtime, nine echo one.” We are fairly close to the call and I am just flying down the road. The sun now has mostly set as we arrive just behind rescue and engine 11. As we pull up, all the flashing lights are reflecting off of all the fire fighters’ bunker gear as they run into the apartment complex. We hop out and go to pull the gurney out of the back. Before we even get the bed fully extended, firemen are running out and shouting for us to get the bed back in, that we were going to work in the truck. I run up front to man the wheel and wait for Freddy to give me the go ahead. The patient’s mother is assisted into the passenger seat. I don’t know how to describe how it feels to be in this situation, to have a young mother seeing her infant limp and motionless. She is acting as any mother would in her place. My partner and the fire dept. are moving quickly and efficiently. Mom is crying and asking if her baby is ok. I’m trying to drive fast, smooth, and safe while navigating and keeping an eye on mom and the crew in back. Freddy tells me to clear the medical radio to University hospital and give report. My report is short and to the point:

me: “University hospital, University ER, 2736, code 3 traffic.”

dispatch: “This is UNM, go ahead.”

me: “Good evening UNM, this is Eric in 2736 coming to your facility code 3 at this time with a 2 month, 2 month old male not breathing at this time. ETA of about 6 minutes any questions?”

dispatch: “No questions, see you in 6, UNM out.”

me: “ku7891 out”

I am driving fast and furious…but safe…down San Mateo as a police interceptor is helping me clear intersections along the way. People are moving out of the way with the assistance of APD and a whole lot of lights, sirens, and air horn. We are nearly there and mom is receiving calls from family and friends but quickly tells them that she can’t talk and that she’ll call them back. I sit in silence because I’m focusing on my driving, but also because I just can’t think of anything to say to this poor lady. I pull under the canopy at the University emergency department and rush to the back doors. During transport, the crew had intubated, ventilated, suctioned the patient and continued CPR. I pulled the gurney out as firemen were on it, hanging off/on it, and rushed down the hall into the trauma/resus(citation) room. The team there was primed in expectancy for us and had everything prepped and ready to go. Mom was taken by staff to a waiting area. We transferred the child to the hospital bed, disconnected our gear and pulled the gurney out of the room and out of the way. I set the gurney to the side and just stood back and watched all the happenings. There was yelling, there was rushing, there was quiet. Doctors listening for lung sounds and heart beats. The heart monitor is showing asystole. The team continues CPR. Mom is brought into the room and given a chair. Monitor is still showing asystole. I’m standing just outside the room so I can’t hear what is being said, but I hear mom wail and collapse into the chair receiving the quietus. My heart sinks. The room is silent except for the mother’s cries. The team is putting things away and walking out. My hope is lost, Baby is dead.

I don’t know what to think or feel. I’m frustrated by the loss of this child, but maybe even more so by the reactions of my colleagues. Why is it that people do everything in their power to flee from God…until there is a need in their lives. No, sorry, there is no saved by works, no point system where you accumulate credits for doing good works like trying to save an infant’s life and then get your reward from God all Chuck E Cheese style. NO. “He’s in a better place now, he has no more suffering.” What do they know of heaven? What do they know of suffering? “Needless death is sad.” Really? So, like, necessary death isn’t? It just bothers me when people who could care less about the sin in their lives and the offenses they commit against God, talk about “their creator” or “a better place” and their “due rewards for good works here on earth.”

Please pray for me, that I would know how to deal with calls like these; but also that I would know how to deal with those I work with and around. It is so hard sometimes to be Christlike in a world where “they grope in darkness with no light, staggering like drunken men.” However, my Lord and Savior sustains me and I take comfort knowing that His lamp shines over my head, and by His light I walk through darkness (Job 29:3).

The parent-child relationship is a unique and dynamic thing. We begin our lives completely dependent on our parents. We eventually grow to resent that dependence and finally find our own independence. Hopefully at some point we learn to appreciate the authority and support our parents gave us when we were younger…and ultimately the tables start to turn and our parents begin to depend on us, or at least we feel somewhat responsible for them. It’s a strange feeling when you realize that you’re more concerned about your parents’ well-being than about yourself.

My mother has been fighting Lyme disease (or something like it) for the last 5 years, and after moving last year from Missouri to a drier climate in Colorado, her health began to improve gradually. Bad days still happen, but overall she has been much healthier and more energetic lately than I’ve ever seen her since 2003. Last Saturday, she emailed me asking for prayer for Jonathan, my 9-year-old brother, who had an awful case of the flu. Two days later I received another email from her saying Jonathan was improving but she had come down with the same flu and was feeling worse than she had in months, or even years. I spoke with her briefly on Wednesday and she sounded terrible. I received two more emails today, from her and my dad, both asking for prayer because she is in severe pain that is increasing every day.  The flu isn’t a scary thing for most people, but in my mom’s case, any kind of cold or flu can exacerbate her ongoing illness and be a drastic setback in her progress. God has granted my mom a strong and persistent faith in Him, but times like these are usually a test for her. I am learning to pray for her spiritual health in these trials just as much as her physical health, as I have seen how her suffering in the body has resulted in great spiritual growth. I constantly fight the temptation to worry when I know she is suffering, especially since I am not able to be with her. Thankfully, I can rest in the Lord, knowing that He is still good and sovereign, He has a purpose in all of this, and He loves my mother more than I could ever begin to love her.

“Lettuce praise.” If salad is a regular fixture on your plate, you may know what I’m talking about. If the word “lettuce” brings to your mind a fast food cheeseburger with a single watery leaf sticking out…or if salad is just something that dieters eat, you are probably wondering why in the world I am paying tribute to lettuce. Please allow me to explain.

Not many years ago, a lettuce salad consisted only of some chopped iceberg, a few slices of tomato, 3 or 4 croutons, and a hefty helping of ranch dressing. (By the way, whoever considered that to be “healthy” was slightly delusional.) Fortunately, salads have come into their own over the last several years. Now we have romaine, green and red leafy, spinach, arugula, butterhead…the list goes on. The toppings are endless: cucumber, avocado, olives, onion, eggs, nuts and seeds, dried fruits, cheeses, varieties of meats. The salad dressing shelves in the grocery store are rapidly expanding. Basically, a salad can be as fun and tasty as you want it to be!

The field of nutrition has also evolved greatly over the last few decades. Any person on the street will probably know the basics of good nutrition: drink lots of water, don’t eat too much fat or sugar, avoid fast food. But if you go beyond the basics, things can get very confusing. Even a trip to the supermarket can be a challenge, as shoppers can quickly be overwhelmed by the number of choices they have when looking for something as simple as a loaf of bread. With the incredible amount of food at our fingertips, we need to be informed about which choices will be the best for ourselves and our families.

I want to make the world of nutrition a little more understandable, and a possibly more interesting, for the average person who wants to be healthy. Good nutrition doesn’t have to be boring, like the old iceberg and ranch salad. We can enjoy food and be nutritionally sound at the same time!

green mango salad:

For a fresh twist on salads, try this low fat, protein rich delight from the south pacific.

I have never really enjoyed going to work and for this reason, I feel grateful for my current job with Albuquerque Ambulance Service. This really is probably the first time in my life that I have liked my job…enough to keep it for as long as I have. I am an emergency medical technician at the basic level. My primary functions are operating the ambulance, assisting the paramedic, working along with the fire department, assessing and providing patient care. I guess that encompasses it all. It’s a pretty exciting job at times, especially when higher priority calls requiring a lights and sirens response are toned out. I’m not an aggressive driver normally and I really don’t get all “Jekyll and Hyde” on the job, but it’s definitely a rush driving code 3 through traffic. Most of our calls are actually not all that exciting or even worthy of a 911 response, but I don’t really mind that. I really love to help people and I have an awesome opportunity to really make a difference in people’s lives. At the same time, my job often confronts me with the sobering fact of life and death. But it’s not always the patient that we take care of. We really look out for the patient’s family and friends too and that is what I enjoy most.

Lots of people call EMS thinking that because they are being taken to the ER by ambulance that they will be seen quicker. This is not true. Another reason our call volume is so high is because our city no longer has a “drunk tank” or a facility to babysit our urban outdoorsman in moments of heavy intoxication. Most of the people we pick up for alcohol (ETOH) abuse have no other medical problem at that moment other than inebriation. Obviously these people face potentially serious medical conditions like renal or liver failure, hepatitis, hypothermia, or getting hit by a car, etc. In some cities, the local police department is dispatched to these people and local PD transports them to the “drunk tank” unless they have any other injuries. It is then that EMS is called to assess the patient and transport to the ER if necessary, as opposed to now where we are sent to all etoh abuse and under EMS laws set in place to protect both the patient and the medical providers, we must transport them due to their inebriation.

At least now they are playing commercials on the radio about reserving emergency medical services for … EMERGENCIES. I guess I can simply view it as job security, but it is frustrating on nights when we are short staffed and the 911 calls coming in seem endless and there have been calls holding for awhile since we have no units available to respond, and knowing this as we coax our crapulous friend into the ambulance.

There are other times however, like the other night, that make you really enjoy the night. We had just been canceled off our call because the patient decided not to go by ambulance and refused medical treatment. The fire department got written confirmation of his refusal and was right on our heels heading out of the house. I’m not sure why, but APD was also dispatched to this call, and he was leaving along with the rest of us. (APD usually only is dispatched to car accidents, shooting/stabbings, child cases, assaults, overdoses, psychiatric) We were parked behind Rescue 14 and just waiting to leave. The cop was talking to the driver so we just waited patiently. After just a moment, AFD drove off and the cop started heading to our ambulance. Cop tells us that he is borrowing a buddies car and only had one key to it…and that he had locked it inside the car. I dunno, maybe it’s because I’ve had some experience with ghetto breaking into cars and had a quick lesson from a locksmith as he was working on our Mazda, but I offered to help. Our shift was basically over and we were heading to the gas pumps to refuel and return to base so we had a little time. I had the cop go ask for a coat hanger from the people in the house we had just left. So I don’t really know what I’m doing, but to be totally honest…I just wanted to try and break into a police interceptor. lol. I grabbed our blood pressure cuff and straightened out the hanger. The cop and I worked the cuff in between the door and the body of the car and inflated it. It’s about this time that my partner Freddy comes and joins the jollification. We really didn’t have the right tools, so we pried the door open with our fingers, the cops emergency shank, and a couple handcuffs. Needless to say, the vehicle is going to require a bit of touch up work around the door…and maybe some slight body work. So, we’ve got the cuff inflated enough to pry the door open some and we’re working the hanger down into the car in hopes of depressing the unlock button. The problem is that we would straighten the hanger, but getting it down into the car would inevitably bend it and with it bent, there was no way we could apply enough force on the unlock button with the hanger bending. After lots more trials, door prying, handcuff relocations and paint removal, the cop says that he wishes he had a car antennae. Well, I’m thinking…”let’s make this dream a reality!” so I suggest to the officer that the white van parked behind us had a suitable antennae and kindly asked him to retrieve it. He comes back quickly with it and says, “you saw nothing.” “See what?” says I as I’m jamming the newly acquired jimmy down past the weather stripping. We got the job done and Mr. lawman was pleased. I’ll probably never get a chance to break into a cop car again…but at least now I know how…and so do you!

I love you Abby! It isn’t because of just one or even a handful of things. It is all the little things that make me constantly fall deeply in love with you over and over again. Even though you’re not the hip hop dancing cheerleader crunkfest I may or may not have thought you were at some point in time, you are absolutely perfect for me in every way. The sovereignty of God is truly amazing. You do so much for me everyday. I would be completely lost without you. How do you accomplish so much in and around the home, take care of your needs, Calla’s …Callaness, and still find time to love me so thoroughly? Thorough love doesn’t sound all that romantic, but I truly feel that every day we have had together, you have loved me completely, genuinely, tenderly, compassionately, submissively, Godly. Our good times have also been sprinkled with robust arguments, multiple rounds of the “who can say meaner things louder game” and plenty of other childish behavior…mostly because of me, instigated by me, carried out by me and finished by me. I pray constantly for patience towards my family and friends. You are just so wonderful and I know for a fact that I often take you for granted. I’m always being told how lucky I am to have a wife like you. I know that my love for you has never been in question but I apologize for not being very good at showing and telling you as often as I should. I love you so deeply and only wish to spend many more years with you by my side. I am so thankful for having you as the mother of our child[ren]. My thoughts scatter and dart off in all directions, but I hope that you can see my heart and my intentions … Despite my 2:23am ramblings. Abby I love you so much and I weep even now wishing I could be with you, next to you, holding you. I will love you forever and pray daily that He blesses me with the ability to love you as He loves us. You are my wife, my life, my tard…WILL YOU ALSO BE MY VALENTINE?

Like I’ve said before, I’m making an effort to drop some weight or at least lose the fat. I haven’t started riding my bike to work but I fully intend to and am working on building the ability and confidence. My current hold back is thinking about the ride home…after a 12 hour shift…at 4:30 am…uphill. The other downside is that our current facility doesn’t have a setup for me to change or deodorize or store my bike. I’ve worked some of these issues out and plan to begin biking to work once it warms up some and isn’t so bitterly cold in the mornings.

As part of my conditioning process, I’ve been riding on the Paseo del Bosque Bike Trail. I started out at the parking lot on Alameda. I think the trail goes north of that point a little bit but I’m not sure. From there you head south on an awesome paved two-way trail.

enlarge to show texture

I had gone to the half way point near the botanical gardens once with Pete, but this particular morning I felt daring and wanted to go for the whole thing. My cycloputer said that the total trip time was 2 hours and 8 minutes covering 32.5 miles. (I should note that trip time only calculates when the wheels are spinning….so when I fell off my bike or when I was laying on the bench attempting CPR on myself or when I was regaining consciousness at the Tingley Beach snack bar…that doesn’t count) It’s pretty crazy to think about how much ground I covered on a bike. I know some of you do this kind of thing on a regular basis and biking across Albuquerque ain’t no thang, BUT FOR ME IT IS!

This trip was more enjoyable than my first time due to the addition of some biking shorts. Yup, I wore spandex. Not only was it form fitting with just enough stretch, in and around the critical perineum areas, they sewed in a giant man pad…also known to some as a chamois. This was a literal life saver and I’m a true believer. I’m not so sure however about the chamois cream that Mr. Dude was trying to sell me. Apparently you take this cream and smear and or slather it up in the aforementioned sector and it’s supposed to be amazing…i dunno. It just sounds kinda gross and messy and I’m not sure I want to be seen at the check out line with chamois cream either. SO, for those of you that are now curious and desire to experience a non greasy skin lubricant specifically formulated to decrease friction, increase coolness and prevent bacterial and fungal infections but share my timidity, a little bird told me that shaving cream works as well due to its similar ingredients. Little bird also said that if you use shaving cream, DO NOT use any with menthol. Ye have been warned.

Hooray and congratulations to us! We have just smote our third year of marriage down to the ground with a vicious blow. Arising victorious, we eagerly anticipate numero quatro años de marriagioso. Looking back it seems like hardly any time has passed since we had our fateful first mountainous game of horseshoes. Although we battled furiously as combatants on opposing teams, there was definitely something there. Abby looked amazing and I smelled like the inner workings of stocked rainbow trout. Abby didn’t talk to me and I was too scared to even look at her. You must think me the fool; however, God knew that our density would bring us together.

I’m not the most romantic man…I’ve missed a few Valentine’s days, some birthdays, a couple Christmases, pretty much all anniversaries…EXCEPT this one. We had our good friends Jon, Elaine, and Hemanth come over to watch Callita. The afternoon began with an invigorating spin around the ice skating rink. Outpost just opened their second rink and connected the two to create the 1/5 mile monstrosity known as the CooLLOOP™. Two hours later, we hobbled through snow and sleet to the jeep and headed to the theater with a quick pit-stop at starbucks. We had planned to see “I Am Legend” for awhile so that’s what we saw…despite the three free special screening tickets we got for “Fools Gold.” Our reviews for the movie were mixed, but we both enjoyed it and had plenty to discuss and try to figure out about the storyline over our bountiful spread at Paul Fleming Chang’s. It was a slow night which worked out for our benefit. Our waitress was awesome. I’d like to say she was just nice and not putting on an act for tips. Jessica brought us a couple of complimentary soups for starters and when our meal was served she surprised us with one of their new “The Flavors of Yunnan” entrees, the wok charred beef.

Wok Charred Beef (entree) – searing the marinated flank steak and fresh vegetables in the wok gives this dish a charred, smoky flavor which compliments the sweetness of the peppers. The Yunnan region is known for its vast variety of mushrooms and several varieties are used in the Wok Charred Beef (Shiitake, Oyster and King Trumpets), which add distinctive flavor and texture to the dish. The combination of sweet red, orange and yellow peppers, three varieties of mushrooms, green leeks and the charred, caramelized color of the flank steak create a dish that is both a visual and culinary treat.

We originally ordered the chicken lettuce wraps, oolong marinated sea bass, Cantonese beef chow fun, and the chengdu spiced lamb. Clearly we were already in over our heads so with the addition of her generous blessings, our table for two looked like a wedding feast fit for the master lord of all Asia. Needless to say, we had plenty of leftovers. It looked like we hardly even touched some of the dishes, so before Jessica came back to pack up our to go boxes, we conglomerated the food into centrally located heaps in their respective dishes to give the appearance that glorious feasting had just swept through like a pack of “dark seekers.”

I had a wonderful night with my dearly beloved wife and I thank the Lord for His love, kindness, and foreknowledge/compassion in placing her in my life.

Trees are my witness, whooooeeee, we climbed up them rocks rocks.

As part of my new lifestyle change towards healthier living, I’ve been trying to stay active and exercise more. I’ve been biking more in hopes to make human powered two wheel drive forward motion my primary mode of occupational commutal transportation. In the mean time, the family decided to do a little hiking over baba’s long weekend. After doing some research on the trails around the Sandia Mountains, we settled on Tree Spring:

Tree Spring
What makes it special: It begins at about 8,500 feet, so it’s quite cool. It’s not very hard and offers an excellent view of Pino and Bear canyons at the top. Shady for most of its length, this is a relaxing introduction to the pine forests on the east side of the Sandias.
Length: 4 miles
Hiking time: 1.3 to 3 hours
Elevation gain: 8,480 to 9,400 feet
Difficulty: Easy
Season: Late spring through early fall
Directions: Take Interstate 40 to the Cedar Crest exit about 6 miles east of Albuquerque. Go north on N.M. 14 about 6 miles and turn left on N.M. 536, the road to the crest. The road passes several picnic areas before coming to the Tree Spring trail head on the left. Signs mark the parking area.

We started out at a good time; however, our fatal flaw was our incurable need to overdose on Blake’s Lotaburger breakfast burritos. The timing of our fix could not have been planned more horribly wrong. With full stomachs, we set out to the trail head. The trail was covered in hard pack snow and was very slick in the shady areas. Armed with trekking poles, water, a Schäferhund, a toddler and some extra clothes, we hiked for about 2 hours. We didn’t make it to the top due to a full schedule ahead of us and…deep sonorous panting from our innermost pleural space.

It was a beautiful day and we hope to return soon to reclaim our pride and conquer the “Difficulty: Easy” beast and smite it down to the ground.

My mom and sister bought this outfit for Calla some time ago. We were waiting for her to grow into it and as luck would have it, that time came right at Chinese lunar New Year. Actually, she barely fit in the neck but everything else was fine. The outfit is a shiny light pink and yellow two piece embroidered with dragonflies all over it. To complete the look, she had little black cloth shoes with embroidered flowers and pigtails to top it off.

She loved climbing the stairs and showing off her shoes so I took that opportunity to snap some fun kung fu baby pics.

P.S. Guest appearance by “Fuzz” in picture two.